Listen Like You’re Wrong

The Perks of Being an Educator

“Most people do not listen with the intent to understand; they listen with the intent to reply.” Stephen R. Covey

One of the great perks of being an educator over the last three decades… I get to learn just as much as I get to teach.

Last month I delivered the first of my keynote series for 2026 at a leading, private all-girls school in Melbourne.

The principal opened the day by explaining why leadership development matters so deeply in their school environment. She described the program as a gift back to the leaders. Investing in the people who invest in the teachers that they lead, and the students they serve every day.

But one line that she shared stopped me in my tracks!

She encouraged the leaders in the room to hold one simple principle. This would ensure that the girls (their students), continue to remain at the centre of every conversation:

“Argue as if you’re right. Listen as if you’re wrong.”

What a beautiful modern take. I reflected on Stephen R. Covey’s fifth habit, “Seek first to understand, then to be understood”.

That line has stayed with me, partly because of the moment we’re now living in. And let’s be honest, the world feels very wonky right now.

The war in the Middle East. Geopolitical and political polarisation is sharper than ever. Cost of living and cost of business pressures biting. And just when we think that we’ve wrapped our heads around one big shift, along comes the next wave of AI.

As someone who spends a lot of time acting as a trusted advisor to both my team and to the leaders of many organisations, I’ve noticed something about myself.

I’ve become more opinionated. More binary in my thinking. Sometimes less patient. And with perspectives that feel, at least to me, obviously flawed. This realisation was more unpleasant than it was uncomfortable.

Because listening, (I mean really listening), has been one of the core leadership principles that we’ve tried to practise and teach now for over 30 years.

So, I decided to run a small social experiment on myself. Instead of simply reminding myself to listen more, I’ve been playing with the second half of that line:

“Listen as if you’re wrong.”

What I love about this approach is that it doesn’t ask me to become a different person.

Quickly for the record. I’m naturally feisty. I read the room quickly. I form opinions fast. I’m comfortable making decisions and executing on them. That’s part of my leadership style that has served me well.

It’s my Superpower. But it’s also my Kryptonite!

But now this small mindset shift creates a powerful counterbalance. It allows me to keep the ‘feisty’ Richard, whilst growing the patient and curious listening Richard.

Because listening ‘as if you’re wrong’ changes the internal dialogue of your conversation. It shifts the stories that we tell ourselves. Instead of waiting to speak, you listen with curiosity. Instead of defending your view, you become interested in what you might be missing.

And here’s what I’ve noticed. People open up more. Conversations become richer and more interesting.

And occasionally (well actually quite often), I realise that my first take wasn’t the full picture. Thirty years into this work and I’m still learning!

Which brings me back to the real perk of being an educator. Sometimes the most valuable lesson in the room is the one that you only hear… if you’re really listening and really wanting to learn.

So, if you’re feeling the pull of our increasingly loud, divisive and opinionated world, then maybe try the same little experiment?

Reserve judgement and keep your initial convictions to yourself. Then listen, just for a moment, as if you might be wrong. You might be surprised what shifts.

Wishing you a great week of listening as if you’re wrong.

Richard Dore
CEO - Director of Partnerships
Proteus Leadership