One Conversation. Once a Week. Everything Changes
The high-impact habit that builds engagement and relationships – fast.
The manager is the single most important factor in an employee’s engagement at work.
– Gallup, Culture Shock (2023)
A new team member was once invited into my office to celebrate and recognise her early success, by involving her in a project that I knew she’d be excited about. Instead, on her arrival she walked in nervous… almost bracing herself.
When I asked if she was okay, she admitted thinking that she was about to be told off.
That moment stuck with me. Not because of anything that I had done, but because of what she had experienced before. In her world, being called into the boss’s office meant something had either gone, or was going wrong.
It took quite some time for her to realise that a conversation with her leaders did not have to mean correction. Rather, it could mean connection!
That experience is not unique. Speaking with many of our clients and especially senior HR and L&D leaders, the conversation nearly always lands in the same place. How do we lift our engagement?
And, not just survey scores either.
Many admit those numbers have not shifted in years. What they are really chasing is something deeper. A genuine shift in leadership and culture. They want their people more connected, more invested, and certainly more engaged with genuine heartfelt service to clients.
At some point, I suggest what might be the most powerful management habit available.
It’s not my idea. However, decades of Gallup research reinforced in their book Culture Shock, make it clear to me that the biggest driver of engagement is not policy, perks or incentives. It’s the relationship with their immediate manager.
That’s it!
And every time I say it out loud, the reaction is almost identical. They look at me like I’m on drugs. Because the idea just sounds so ridiculously simple.
Ask every leader to have one meaningful conversation each week… with every person in their team.
Not a task update. Not a performance correction. Not a hurried exchange between meetings. Instead, a genuine, intentional conversation.
The room usually goes quiet. Then someone eventually voices what everyone else is thinking.
“Richard… that sounds great. But there’s no way we could ever get our leaders to do that.”
Yet the research is clear. Managers drive at least 70% of engagement variance. And… regular check-ins nearly triple engagement.
Gallup’s latest State of the Global Workplace data shows that only around 23% of employees globally are engaged at work. In Australia and New Zealand, the numbers are almost identical, sitting at roughly 24% engaged, with around 60% not engaged and 16% actively disengaged.
Which leads to a simple truth.
Conversations Create Engagement.
If only one in four people are engaged at work, then the problem isn’t effort – it’s the right focus!
What that engagement actually looks like in most workplaces is often misunderstood. I often describe it as the 20–60–20 Reality.
The 20–60–20 Reality
The real tragedy right now, in Australia? Almost 20% of the workforce are actively disengaged. In fact, they are so disengaged that their impact on the workplace is harmful. Hindering others from being engaged.
This small but visible group (if allowed), will almost certainly drain and consume a disproportionate amount of your time and energy. Yet even within this group, not everyone is the same. With the right leadership though some can be re-engaged, while a small minority will require clear boundaries, sometimes with tough decisions.
Your job is to help them grow… or help them go!
Then there is the 60%. Those who are not engaged. They quietly do their job, but they are currently disconnected. This is where the greatest opportunity sits. With little or no attention, they can easily drift into the actively disengaged category. However, with the right conversations though, they can (and will) re-engage.
And then there is your top 20%. Your highly engaged, high performing people. The irony is that we often leave them alone. Why? Because they are highly capable and self-sufficient. Yet they are the ones that we often only hear from when they resign.
That is the risk.
When leadership attention is consumed by the disengaged few, we unintentionally neglect the many. We overlook the very people driving performance and positivity across the workplace.
Gallup’s #1 Leadership Habit
Highly engaged teams have one thing in common. Regular, meaningful conversations.
Not formal reviews. Just consistent check-ins to understand what is working, what’s not, and what support may be needed. When this happens, people feel known and seen.
What is often underestimated is just how quickly that shift can take place. A simple question like, “How has your week been?” This can open a window into what matters to them. What they enjoy. What they value. And, what is really happening in their world.
Sometimes (just as quickly), it can go deeper. You realise that they’re tired, questioning things, or carrying something personal that is keeping them up at night. Many times though you will discover that they are loving life, their current role and are hungry for more challenges.
In those ‘window’ moments you stop seeing the role, and you start seeing the person. A human being first, and a human doing second, as Ben Crowe (renowned Mindset coach) would say.
Four Reminders for Meaningful Conversations
1. Connection Over Correction
Too many leaders only show up when something goes wrong. Over time, the message becomes clear. If the boss calls, I’m in trouble.
Better leaders build connection first. So when correction is needed, it lands and is far more likely to be heard.
2. Lead Through Listening
Leadership is not just about speaking. It’s about listening. Not to respond, but with the intent to understand.
When leaders listen well, people open up. They raise issues earlier. They contribute more. And trust follows.
3. Culture in Every Conversation
Culture does not live alone in strategy. It lives and comes alive in conversations.
As Gallup highlights, employees experience culture through their Manager, and through everyday interactions. Every conversation signals what matters.
4. Small Habit, Big Impact
Big change rarely comes from big initiatives. It comes from small habits, done consistently.
A weekly check-in. A thoughtful question. A few minutes of real attention. Over time, these moments build trust and they lift engagement. Remember, the answer is simple: One conversation at a time.
Final Leadership Reflection
Before your next meeting, make sure that you are present and consider:
Who have I not genuinely connected with recently?
Am I only showing up when something is wrong?
What would happen if I committed to one meaningful conversation each week?
Leadership rarely need more complexity. Sometimes it starts here. One conversation. Once a week. Because when conversations change, culture changes and engagement will follow.
The future of work will be defined less by policies and more by the quality of relationships between managers and employees.
– Gallup, Culture Shock (2023)
Richard Dore
CEO – Proteus Leadership