You’re not an impostor – you’re just Consciously Incompetent
Feeling like an impostor is a sign that you’re becoming more competent,
not less.– Adam Grant
Years ago, sitting around the Proteus lunch table – we started the kind of random fun conversation that begins light, veers into irreverent hypotheticals, and then before you know it, you’re in a good old-fashioned debate. The topic of the day: Impostor Syndrome.
It was one of those fun team moments where you must pick a side, defend your position, and then see where the discussion takes us.
And to be honest, the more we explored it, the more I found myself becoming more curious about how we use this term… and more importantly, how we might misuse and overuse it.
So, is it a helpful label? One to embrace for self-awareness, vulnerability and growth – or maybe just another HR fad that we’re overindulging in?
Because the trend that I’m seeing – in clients and especially at our workshops – is that many of us are quick to call ourselves “impostors” when in reality, we’re not!
We’re not faking it. We’re not misleading anyone. We’re not frauds. We’re just learning – sometimes awkwardly, sometimes publicly, and often imperfectly.
It’s Not Impostor Syndrome – It’s Conscious Incompetence
Being a leadership nerd and an educator at heart, there is a classic model that gets little airtime outside of learning and development circles: the Four Stages of Competence.
It’s been around since the ‘70s, made popular by Gordon Training International (and often misattributed to Maslow).
It’s not just for HR nerds – it’s a brutally helpful way to understand why we often melt down when we step outside of our comfort zone. Then it helps to reframe the feeling of being an imposter, into a more positive one of growth and opportunities.
The Four Stages of Competence
- Unconscious Incompetence
You don’t know what you don’t know. Blissfully ignorant! - Conscious Incompetence
You now know what you don’t know. Painful. - Conscious Competence
You know it, but you still must work at it. Making Progress. - Unconscious Competence
You’re in flow. It’s second nature. High-performance mode.
It’s in Stage Two – the dreaded Conscious Incompetence phase – where most of us come unstuck.
Conscious Incompetence feels uncomfortable… because it is!
You suddenly see all your gaps, and it’s quite disorienting.
Your inner dialogue then turns into your ‘inner critic’, and it’s where you start thinking:
“I’m not sure if I deserve this opportunity.”
“I don’t dare ask for help.”
“It’s only a matter of time until they discover I’m a fraud!”
“This jig is up!”
And that’s when the Impostor flag gets waved.
But I’d argue – this isn’t impostor syndrome at all. It’s just the sharp sting of finally knowing… what you don’t know.
You’re Not a Fraud – You’re Just Growing
I often have leaders and team members come to me and quietly confess, “I think I have impostor syndrome.” But when we dig into it, it’s never about deception. It’s never about pulling the wool over anyone’s eyes.
It’s simply that they’ve stepped into something new and unfamiliar, and suddenly they’re aware of their own limitations.
That’s not being an impostor. That’s being human. And more than that – it’s the very moment where growth begins.
So, let’s stop treating this stage like a syndrome, and start recognising it for what it really is: progress!
Adam Grant Says It Best
Organisational psychologist Adam Grant has a brilliant take on this. He says: “The highest form of self-confidence is believing in your ability to learn.”
And he contrasts Impostor Syndrome with Growth Mindset like this:
It’s a subtle but powerful shift. One keeps you stuck. The other moves you forward.
Impostor Syndrome
I don’t know what I’m doing. It’s only a matter of time until everyone finds out.
Growth Mindset
I don’t know what I’m doing yet. It’s only a matter of time until I figure it out.
What’s the Takeaway?
Next time that you catch yourself saying, “I’m an impostor,” ask a better question:
“Am I pretending to be something that I’m not? Or, am I just in a space that I’ve never been before?”
If it’s the second one – and let’s be honest, it usually is – then congratulations. You’re in the game. You’re learning. And you’re exactly where you’re meant to be.
We don’t grow from pretending that we know. We grow by acknowledging that we don’t – and then leaning in, regardless.
Impostor Syndrome might be the catchphrase of the moment – but it’s not always the right diagnosis.
Sometimes, we’re just experiencing the awkward, stretching and uncomfortable space of Conscious Incompetence.
And while that place feels uncomfortable and unpleasant – it’s where the real transformation takes place.
So. Don’t retreat. Don’t over-label it. Don’t catastrophise. And definitely, don’t wallow in self-doubt that’s disguised as humility.
Own it. Work through it. Grow.
Remember, you’re not an impostor.
You’re just in the messy middle of getting better. And that’s the best place you could possibly be.
Richard Dore
CEO – Proteus Leadership